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Where I currently am, we are only less than two hours before we hit 2011. For the rest of the world.. Happy New Year!!
I’m glad this year is about to end, because it hasn’t been the best of years, but it hasn’t been the worst either. I learned that life can change rapidly, nothing is certain. I guess you can say that I learned to appreciate things more, to enjoy life at a higher level. Every moment even if its something “small” can be important later on.
I’m ready to ring in the new year, and say goodbye to 2010. I’m done with the superstitions. I’m done with eating grapes or throwing them, the whole shabang bang. It doesn’t matter how many wishes you ask for, if you aren’t willing to make changes, and you aren’t willing to fight for what you want. So with that I’ll enter this year bright and happy, smiling big, ready to fight.
I already have some big projects that I need to finish, meetings to attend, places to go and I am more than anxiously waiting for them. I want my new start, and I’m very close to getting it. Im DETERMINED to make this year a GREAT year. There is no time to stop to cry over spilled milk, only time to go forward, time to fight on.
With that I’d like to say this to all of you, enjoy life, savor EVERY moment. There is no time for regrets, no time for what-ifs because while we think of those things we keep moving through time and space and there is no stopping our transition. We are all in constant motion, constant change, weather we notice it or not our lives are changing right before our eyes. Live, love, laugh, dance, jump like never before.
Wishing you all a great new year ahead =)
We’re moving! The thought alone gives me a bitter sweet feeling, I went to visit the new place and I must say that I really liked it. I have many plans too, for one I’ll be doing a lot more exercise, I’ll have more space for myself, I’ll have better lighting conditions to see the stars, I’ll be able to jump into a pool whenever I please. I’m already thinking of swimming in the rain…
While there are many good things about the new house, and all the changes that are about to come over me, I’m a bit sad to leave my home. THIS home. This is where I practically grew up, I’ve been living here almost half of my life. This is where I met my best friends, where for the first time I felt butterflies for someone. This is the place I call home. Within its walls many secrets were told, many memories were made, many tears where cried. If there is a place in this world that has seen me change is this house. This was the place I ran to, skipped to from school and the place I thought of when I was away. My refuge, my home.
I will miss it greatly, and yet at the same time to me its symbolic. A new start awaits for me, interesting how it is so close to the New Year don’t you think? I feel like this is a major step in leaving all the old feelings and old things behind.
It’s time to start again, rebirth.
Smile, moving on isn’t always so bad.
I’m currently under a week long retreat from the world. It’s not the most isolated or best retreat I’ve had but it was one that I definitely needed. Do you ever feel like you need some time and space to put your thoughts straighter? Or just to relax a little bit? I know I do often. I need my retreats like I need air. People often wonder why I isolate myself, I like the quiet days, the days when I know nothing of the world. It helps me think, it helps me keep my center of tranquility and inner stability and strength. Being a student has given me the ability to do this at least once every year, I usually do this in between breaks.
I rest my brain a little, I write, read, more. I listen to music and watch movies, things that I love. I sit outdoors and watch the sky change color right before my eyes. I take a moment to stop and note my surroundings, note the changes the seasons have brought. No social networking sites, nothing to distract me, just me and my surroundings. Nothing else.
I feel at peace. I’m putting pieces of my life puzzle together as I write this. I’m savoring these moments, moments of peace of mind. Who wouldn’t want that?
Smile, give yourself a retreat. We all deserve one.
I have issues, which people have been more than willing to point out many times. Things may be true, my thoughts might have been influenced by what I saw at home, and by what I still see at home today. When I was younger my parents would often fight, really bad. I grew up amongst siblings that loved me dearly and spoiled me but my parents, partially neglected me and did not care if I was present during their fights. I found comfort in school, I isolated myself in books, in homework, I turned into a perfectionist especially when it came to school related things. That’s how I dealt with my own troubles.
Over time I began to separate myself from church, what was the point? My prayers didn’t get answered, my father left, my mom got sick and I felt lonely. By the time I was 18, I made the decision not to go anymore. I have beliefs, mine don’t seem to coincide with everyone and because of that I decided best to separate myself, everyone in their own worlds. I came to see many failed marriages over the years. To start, that of my parents. Second? My siblings, and then friends and acquaintances. I guess you can say I got to the point where I just don’t believe that marriage is something that everyone must do. I personally find it to be a sacred union between two people who love each other, but it saddens me to see how many people take such decision so lightly. Almost as if it were a game. Oh well, it didn’t work, I can just try again, kind of a thing.
I was asked if I would be willing to take the role of a housewife. The typical housewife that stays home, takes care of her home and family. No, I cannot. I truly admire the women that are able to pull that off, its a big responsibility, a great job on its own and not every woman can do that. I can’t. When asked why, I said I would be very unhappy. There’s a reason as to why I’ve stayed in school, why I’ve tried hard. Not because I’m a nerd, not just because I want to help my family out, but because I want to be free. I took that concept early on in life when I saw my parents arguing. I knew that my only way out would be through education. I know that problems will always exist in every relationship but at least I know that I have a backup plan that makes me happy, and no matter what I’ll know that I can take care of myself, that alone makes me feel accomplished.
Smile, we all have a reason to be happy.