I have issues, which people have been more than willing to point out many times. Things may be true, my thoughts might have been influenced by what I saw at home, and by what I still see at home today. When I was younger my parents would often fight, really bad. I grew up amongst siblings that loved me dearly and spoiled me but my parents, partially neglected me and did not care if I was present during their fights. I found comfort in school, I isolated myself in books, in homework, I turned into a perfectionist especially when it came to school related things. That’s how I dealt with my own troubles.

Over time I began to separate myself from church, what was the point? My prayers didn’t get answered, my father left, my mom got sick and I felt lonely. By the time I was 18, I made the decision not to go anymore. I have beliefs, mine don’t seem to coincide with everyone and because of that I decided best to separate myself, everyone in their own worlds. I came to see many failed marriages over the years. To start, that of my parents. Second? My siblings, and then friends and acquaintances. I guess you can say I got to the point where I just don’t believe that marriage is something that everyone must do. I personally find it to be a sacred union between two people who love each other, but it saddens me to see how many people take such decision so lightly. Almost as if it were a game. Oh well, it didn’t work, I can just try again, kind of a thing.

I was asked if I would be willing to take the role of a housewife. The typical housewife that stays home, takes care of her home and family. No, I cannot. I truly admire the women that are able to pull that off, its a big responsibility, a great job on its own and not every woman can do that. I can’t. When asked why, I said I would be very unhappy. There’s a reason as to why I’ve stayed in school, why I’ve tried hard. Not because I’m a nerd, not just because I want to help my family out, but because I want to be free. I took that concept early on in life when I saw my parents arguing. I knew that my only way out would be through education. I know that problems will always exist in every relationship but at least I know that I have a backup plan that makes me happy, and no matter what I’ll know that I can take care of myself, that alone makes me feel accomplished.

Smile, we all have a reason to be happy.

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