Vicious Cycles

     There’s a behavior that has always eluded me, people putting each other down.  I’m not sure I understand why people keep doing this time after time. We do it to Susie, Susie does it to Sammy and Sammy does it to someone else. My question is WHY? Sometimes we do it without meaning to, we say the wrong thing at the wrong time but sometimes we know what we’re doing and we do it anyway. For those of us that have a conscience we feel guilty  yet we do it again sooner or later. It’s a vicious cycle.

     I talked to a friend of mine about this issue and we concluded that there are three types of cyles that fall under this type of behavior: (maybe there’s more?)

People: Cycle One
     People put us down,  whether its your friend, your family, your boss, the stranger you met at the grocery store people try to put us down all the time. Is this a case of envy? Bad day? Bad luck? Or just plain meaness, I’m not sure. I’m sure we’ve all come across someone who tries to put us down just when we’re feeling that rush of happiness, “But it won’t work” or “ I’ve seen better” etc.  Sometimes you don’t even have to be happy for other people to put you down. There are times that I wonder if people are really so evil as to just want to see others down? I think that is just sickening and the worst part is that I’ve seen close people to me do this to others. Tough world we live in huh?

Self: Cycle Two
     WE put ourselves down. That’s right we do it to ourselves too. I’ll raise my hand on this one because there have been a few times when I treated myself like the lowest creature on earth (do understand that I went through some rough times). Sometimes we tell ourselves that we’re so bad, so horrible, the worst of our kind. The problem comes when you actually start to believe what you’re saying. I think that’s the worst fail of all believing these things. The reason is because they’re probably not true and you’re only making things harder on yourself. And again this is a cycle because every once in a while we keep doing it.

Mix: Cycle Three
    Sometimes you get both cycles at once. Someone puts you down and you follow them along. Before you know it you and others are putting yourself down! I can tell you that this is not a good thing.

    How should I deal with this? Well what I’ve come to learn is:
1. Don’t let other people put you down (keeps you away from Cycle One)
    – Sure everyone has their own opinions but let it just be that, an OPINION.
    – Think on the bright side they may actually be wanting to be in your spot.
 2. Be as optimistic as you can (keeps you away from Cycles One, Two and Three)
    – Stop and smell the roses, relax there will be better times.
   
And as I always say: SMILE. Not only does it get you in a better mood, but you might get someone else in a happy mood with just one smile (might keep you away from those vicious cycles too).

Smile, there are many reasons to smile!

  P.S.
  Got anything more to add?

Mother

     Have you ever watched someone sleep? Tonight my mom and I were watching television, after a while I turned to ask her something when I noticed that she was sleeping. She’s beautiful. She looked peaceful as she rested her head on the pillow. It was different from normal, she’s usually busy doing one thing or another, always taking care of everything. At that moment in time she was sleeping, dreaming perhaps. Whatever she was dreaming I hope that it was of something far from reality, something completely different from her everyday life. Everyone deserves a peaceful rest, a time away from the world.

    She has changed so much and yet not at all. For her age she looks very young, she’s wiser everyday. There are times I wished she smiled more, enjoy life at a slower pace. Seeing her sleep gives me hope that perhaps in her dreams she might be doing just that.

     Covered with a blanket, she seems vulnerable. Don’t let that deceive you, she is one of the strongest women you can find. She has done so much for her family and for the people around her, this is her time to catch up with herself. She watched me sleep many times, and now I watch her. I’m older now and I understand more things than before, watching her sleep warms my heart. I’m taking a mental picture, placing it in the album of my life. I’m prolonging this memory to last me a lifetime. I forever want to hear her heartbeat as she dreams peacefully. In a few hours she’ll wake up. For now, everything is just fine in this world far away from reality.

Smile, make the beautiful moments last.

On A Rainy Day

        It’s cold and dark, I can hear the wind swing the raindrops and then they fall. TAP. TAp. Tap. tap. There’s something about nature’s orchestra that makes me feel warm inside. It’s the contrast of worlds the cold and dark against the bright and warm inside.  It’s a hidden beautiful feeling that not many appreciate.

     Many associate a rainy day with sadness but there is so much more. Many hidden wonders in the storm. When was the last time you walked under the rain? The last time you caught a raindrop with your tongue? Can you remember the last time you saw a storm come your way?

      It’s a beautiful sight, the movement of clouds. The big puffy clouds, the innocent and the menacing all in one. They make their way to you, if you pay attention you can hear them march across the sky. Always transforming with every movement. They are the castles and dragons of your imagination. The castles grow bigger and transform into a monstrous creature. The dragon transforms into a field of roses right before your eyes. Nothing is what it seems, its ever changing right before your eyes.

     Trees, how many droplets do you hold? They slide down their branches and leaves. Tap. The roses brightly colored hold water droplets on their petals. They’re delicate, soft, strong but be careful for they have thorns. Water drops hold on until gravity and the rose’s curves give way. Tap. The drop falls to nurture the land.  The smell of the collision between the earth and the sky.

TAP. TAp. Tap. tap.
     
Smile, enjoy the hidden wonders of life.

I Could’ve Been Part 2

     Back in June I wrote a post of the things that I wanted to be when I was little. I wanted to be an explorer, a chef, and an astronomer. Seems like yesterday that I wrote that post, but its been a few months. I can tell you right now that that post alone made me think so much during the Summer. Yet another example of how little things can change your life.

     I didn’t go to school during the summer, I could’ve but due to budget cuts many classes were cancelled  and many got full right away. I stated in my “About” page that I’m currently studying a field related to science, and I love it. However that post made me think of all the things I wanted to be and put aside to follow the current career path that I’m in.

     I told myself back in high school when I was applying to different colleges that I was not going to back out on my career plan. I was going to chose a major and stick through the end. I never wanted to think that I was doing the wrong thing. After that post I got myself to thinking. Is my current career what I want for the rest of my life? Although  I thought for months and months my answer was the same time after time, yes. This is want I want to do, I love it.

     The truth is that although I love my current career my heart is also somewhere else. I had always had that exploring side to me. I was a curious child, and adventurer. I didn’t like to limit myself because I wanted to know more, see more. My current career in many ways is similar and yet very opposite to this. There is no Explorer Major as far as I know, and if there was I think I’d be a double major by now.

     What  I fear is that by the time I’m done with college my dreams and hopes of being a silly explorer will fade away with the life of a typical person. I have decided that I have stuck through thick and thin in my current major I will stick with my goals of one day being an explorer. For now I will finish what I started, I will continue to live my dream as a scientist. When I get that diploma in my hand  I will begin a new journey, the journey I have been waiting for a long time.

Smile, because it’s never too late to follow your dreams.